Saturday, 22 May 2010

Climate-gate or Climate-loo

I have been applying my considerable intellectual gifts to the question about the best names for the almost infinite series of scandals of Al Gore and his ICCCP lackeys. The use of the suffix "-gate" has become very popular - it is a reference to the Watergate scandal in USA a couple of years ago. Thus we have Climate-gate, Himalayas-gate, Dutch-gate, Holland-gate, Netherlands-gate, Duck-gate and so on.

While "gate" most certaintly works well for an American audience, it is less optimal for other countries. After all, Watergate was an internal US affair. In addition, it was just a matter of somebody breaking into an office and discovering a scandal in some letters. It does not at all make justice to the magnitude of the global warming scam: a world-wide all-encompassing plot to enslave and dominate every country and every human being on the face of planet Earth.

I want to propose to base the names of these scandals on another and truly momentous event: the defeat of the French Communist Emperor Napoleon at the battle of Waterloo (see picture above)! Let me explain as clearly as possible. Watergate gave us Climate-gate. Following the same pattern, Waterloo gives us Climate-loo. And for some of the other scandals: Himalayas-loo, Dutch-loo, Holland-loo, Netherlands-loo, Duck-loo and so on for an endless sequence of loos!

Such names will surely make people aware of the great significance and seriousness of these events!

Atqui, e lotio est.


  1. Ladies and gentlemen, my dear Baron and fellow climate scum.

    Climate science is in total disarray.

    Jones sits in a darkened room; his only contact with the outside world for months now an occasional twitch at the drawn curtains.

    Mann is holed up in an out-of-state safe house.
    Briffa’s off scouring Antarctica for more bristlecones.
    And Sagan, were he here, would be hiding out at some scummy inner-city crack den.

    But even so, serious scientists like Goddard, Curtin, Easterbrook and Booker are still
    derided by the headless chicken supporters of the old faction.

    Since Climate-gate we know that the global temperature surface record has been tampered with. Smoothed, homogenised, nipped, tucked and had enough silicone implanted to enjoy some modest career success in adult entertainment media. It’s only due to Roy Spencer’s competence that there are any trustworthy records at all.

    Thusly, this is the point we are at now after all the various “–gates”

    Our dear Baron has sensed that the game now needs to be moved on and the bigger guns of word play brought to bear on the reeling citadel of AGW, and with his noble instincts classical education and all the latin and all, he is ipso facto correct.

    And his instincts are spot on. Let us never forget that in 1974, while the world cowered under the threat of communist domination (rather like today), just as the first stirrings of Eurosocialism planned its multi decadal stealth moves to transform the EEC into the EU.

    But Britain reminded the Europeans just who pulled the strings by using a group of sympathetic Swedes as a proxy to deliver (in English) the Eurovision Proclamation – "Waterloo", at the 1974 Eurovision Song Contest.
    "The history book on the shelf,
    Keeps on repeating itself"
    but just one of the pithy subliminal messages successfully broadcast that night to a European people united in their yearning to be free.

    This strategic master stroke had the effect of delaying implementation of the full EU communist agenda for over 30 years.

    But even with such a prestigious pedigree, I fear the Baron’s suggestion – whilst lauding its intent – falls short on pyrotechnics.

    Penn State-loo.
    Heartland Conference-loo (apparently arch-warmista Denning was invited to speak under the misapprehension he wrote septic columns at the UK’s Daily Telegraph.
    A classic old-tech rotadex fluck up).

    But it all sounds a bit like a (real) estate agent’s house tour description. “…. And over there we keep the foreign temperature records loo”.

    Something more ... more … dramatic is required.

    I therefore respectfully suggest that which I substitute in my own head every time I hear the “gate” suffix: Götterdämmerung.

    Try it and see!

    Berlin 1945 – Götterdämmerung.
    Saigon 1975 - götterdämmerung.
    CRU – götterdämmerung.
    Penn State – götterdämmerung.
    Hadley temperature record - götterdämmerung
    Keith Briffa – götterdämmerung.

    It even sounds dramatic – and for good measure I’m assured by a German speaking contact it means‚ "The fat lady’s already into the final chorus“.

    There are those who say that being one of his more subtle and less obvious works, Wagner’s masterpiece somehow appeals mainly to the obsessive, demented, creepy and voyeuristic stalker types.

    This is, as is always the case with these types of scuttlebutt, a gross oversimplification and besides, I have no idea if Dr. McinTyres is even an opera fan.

  2. Oh dear. There is a contest (, and I took the liberty of nominating the Baron's "loo". But now that I have read chek's admirable alternative, perhaps I should have proposed BPGulf-gotterdammerung:

    Bruce says:
    May 23, 2010 at 2:01 pm
    Is “Deepwatergate” too cute a moniker?

    Wit's End says:

    I’m sorry Bruce, there are too many gates already – 161 and counting! Baron von Monkhofen shrewdly suggests that in deference to the famous episode at Waterloo, we embrace instead the suffix ” – loo” as in “climate-loo.” That would leave us with BP-Spilloo, perhaps.

  3. Baron von Mockhofen23 May 2010 at 12:39

    Dear chek,
    Götterdämmerung is an excellent proposal. Or why not the original Norse term: Ragnarök? Or if we want to keep it Christian: Apocalypse! For instance: Climate-calypse, Himalaya-calypse, Dutch-calypse! I like the sound of it! It should teach those bedwetting alarmists!

  4. Chicken Vinde-loo!

  5. The Scam of Our Lifetime
    Global Warming Caused by Human-made CO2?
    By: Bill Bell

    The idea that humans are causing global warming is little more than nonsense. The goal of the perpetrators is a transfer of wealth with the apparent forfeiture of power to a proposed environmental world government formed by the United Nations. A possible vote on this socio-political concept could be held in Copenhagen, Denmark, this month.

    This would be the abandonment of everything hard working, decent individuals have accomplished over hundreds of years, and satisfies only the cravings of a power hungry, unscrupulous intelligentsia that somehow believe they should rule the world. The cost will be horrendous. Unbelievably, the British, led to believe by a fear-mongering socialist government that their nation would soon disappear beneath the sea, passed a Climate Change bill which that same government concedes will cost 18 billion pounds a year. Tax on a new car in England is already over 5,000 pounds.

    A recent study commissioned by the Toronto Dominion Bank to the Suzuki Foundation and the Pembina Institute projected a cost to Canadians at between $46-$72 billion dollars over the next 10 years.

    The Harvard Business School recently concluded that consumers’ energy costs using cap and trade (one of the current proposals for reducing CO2) will increase the energy costs of a family of four by $6,800 US per year by 2025.

    Why should Canadians grovel in fear and be browbeaten into actions that have no rational explanation or purpose? Someone said “we must never burn our bridges” but clearly this is a time for everyone to voice their opinion no matter whom they antagonize, for as Martin Luther King Jr. said, “Our lives begin to die the day we become silent about things that matter”. Adolf Hitler took power in 1933 to the detriment of the entire world because no one cared and if common sense is not discovered soon we are headed for a similar nightmare, albeit without guns and other weapons of war.

    Briefly, here is a little history of this horror story. Temperature showed a small increase between 1975 and 1998, but we know it had gone both up and down much more precipitously many times in the past. Secretary General U. Thant, tapped Maurice Strong (yes, the same Maurice Strong who engineered the National Energy Program that had a very detrimental effect on Western Canada) to organize the Stockholm Conference on Human Environment or the First Energy Summit. Strong gathered a few climatologists, environmentalists and political activists to form the IPCC (Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change) which in retrospect appears to have been little more than a plausible excuse for world domination by the United Nations. Dr. Neil Hutton states, “The IPCC never made a multidisciplinary effort to determine the oscillatory nature of climate change, its history, and its principal drivers.”

    A few brief comments on Strong, the man who started this debacle, and I quote, “The Great Depression left me very radical”. In Strong’s musings, “North America will be Hell on Earth - - - New Orleans will be ravaged by tropical diseases to such an extent that it becomes little more than a shrinking fortress held only with poisonous amounts of lethal pesticides”. In Los Angeles, “water vendors with armed guards roam the streets” and “Florida will have fallen into the sea.” Strong further states, “Isn’t the only hope for the planet that the industrialized nations collapse? Isn’t it our responsibility to bring that about?”



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