Sunday, 11 July 2010

A lament on the difficulties in making an alarmist spoof site

Humor is a most powerful weapon, often used by the oppressed against their oppressors. By ridiculing and laughing at the oppressors, the oppressed can undermine their authority and make them appear less frightening. For instance, the American revolutionaries used to tell many jokes about the English at their tea parties, and make funny impersonations of the English gay king. The conquered Han Chinese had a lot of dirty jokes about the Mongols and their horses, and Atlas Shrugged is full of the most wonderful anti-socialist humor.
Today, we are facing an even more terrifying oppression from the eco-warmo-fascists, and one weapon we can use against them is ridicule. But here a serious problem arises: how can one ridicule something that is already so utterly, inconceivably ridiculous? How can one crack jokes about something that is a joke itself, albeit a terrible joke that will enslave humanity? When the evil and the absurd, the vicious and the ridiculous join forces, satire becomes a blunt sword.
I have sometimes thought about making a spoof website that makes fun of the typical AGW fanatic blog, like “Deltoid” or “Real Climate” or “Climate Progress”. Maybe I could give it some silly animal name, like the existing sites called "Stoat" and "Rabett run". "Tapeworm Tom's Climate Truth" maybe? It could have been very funny, because we skeptics and anti-ecocommunists have a wonderful sense of humor whereas the warmo-stalinists are as boring as communist commissars in Siberia. They don't get even the simplest joke. But one thing held me back: would anybody really be able to tell that is was a spoof site? Or would it be indistinguishable from the real thing? Would it perhaps turn out to be more sensible than the real thing? This is called the pope's law, which states that when you make fun of the pope, you will never be as funny as the real pope. Of course, Catholics do not laugh in either case.
Indeed, the person who wants to make a parody of the eco-nazis faces an uphill battle. For instance, one might want to make fun of the warmo-terrorists' obsession with al'Gore, who is the pope of their AGW-religion. They talk about him all the time: "Al'Gore said this, al'Gore said that, al'Gore made a movie everybody has to watch, al'Gore got the Nobel Peace prize". On and on they rant about their beloved saint al'Gore, who in fact is fat, has a big house, a big butt, an airbase, a wide girth, and makes billions of dollars from his AGW scam and doesn't dare to debate Lord Monckton. And he is obese too! But the warmists worship him like he was some fat demi-god (I'm not joking), and it is impossible to make up anything more ridiculous, unless one really exaggerates. Maybe one could drone (wearing a fatsuit): "I'm al'Gore and you should all kill yourselves as sacrifices on my altar!" However, that might not be an exaggeration at all. It might one day become perfectly true, and then it is not so funny anymore.
Or one could try to make up funny spoof theories that are even sillier and more illogical than the current AGW theory. But how would that be possible? The AGW theory postulates the existence of so-called positive feedbacks that would amplify the alleged warming caused by the unproven increase of tiny tiny carbon dioxide atoms in the atmosphere. But the "positive feedback" theory is grotesquely illogical - a positive feedback would lead to an infinite cycle of amplifications upon amplifications, until Earth became immensely warm1. Yet they believe it. It doesn't get any sillier than that!
Then there is the AGW-drones’ fanatical belief in authority. "It was published in a peer-reviewed journal, so it must be true", "all these scientific academies and societies support the AGW theory", "all these journal papers support the AGW theory". It's like listening to Muslims shouting that all these Ayatollahs and Imams and Muftis say that Allah is great. Of course, the warmo-talibans don't even understand the articles they rant about; they simply believe what the authors claim. The other side of that litany is that nobody who is not a member of the climate science cabal and doesn't have a diploma in back-scratching AGW orthodoxy is to be trusted: "Lord Monckton is not a climate scientist", "McIntyre is not even a PhD", "Watts is just a TV meteorologist". It is just because these people are independent and uncorrupted thinkers that we should trust them!
And finally, there are the outlandish conspiracy theories of the climate change clowns. They scream about money from the oil companies, and connections to the tobacco companies, and about right-wing think-tanks and scientists for hire. It is all silly lies for the gullible masses of course, and the great irony is what a lack of imagination it reveals. The dreamed-up oil conspiracies are nothing compared to the real conspiracies that the kleptocratic masters of the AGW new world order have concocted and are enacting as you read these very words. How do you make fun of such unimaginative people as the CO2-haters? Silly, no sense of humor and no imagination: that's the Gore-Jugend for you!
One could make a really long list about such issues: their ad-hominem-throwing, the way AGW has become a religion, the denial of the criminal data-fudging and curve-tricking, the hypocrisy in pretending to care for people in Africa while denying them the blessings of fossil fuels such as driving SUVs, their naive unawareness of the powerful economical interests behind the AGW bubble (i.e. the renewable energy industry, the electric car industry, the low-energy light bulb industry, Greenpeace), their rabid ramblings against anyone who dares to question them, their blind devotion for al'Gore, their ugly earth-colored clothes, their boring vegan food (fit for rabbits), their pathetic stereotyping, and their endless projections of their own flaws and pathologies upon their noble opponents. Given how utterly ridiculous and idiotic the climate fundamentalists are, it is no easy task to make fun of them in a classy and sophisticated manner, just like it is hard to make chaste jokes about prostitutes. The jokes tend to get as grotesque and vulgar and shrill and tasteless as the people you are joking about. And yet they would be quite indistinguishable from the real thing. Indeed, some people have tried to make AGW-maniac spoof sites, most notably DeSoggyBog but with little success. Hmm, maybe the best joke would be to simply repeat what the eco-talibans are saying. Their own words are the best jokes!

1 We know that the feedbacks are negative, which makes it nearly impossible for the climate to change, unless it is by natural causes like during the Medieval Warming Period.


  1. I think the Al'Gorey/Masseuse Sex tape, assuming it can be watched without regurgitating, will finally put an end to this whole AGW fantasizing and a lot of other bad things too.

    In the meanwhile we must rely on blogscience (and gin&tonic) to fend off the wearisome warmist propaganda.

    Thanks for all you do, Baron.

    Long live Sarah and Trig!

  2. Bishop Phil, a scientific illiterate afflicted with the malady of being a complete wanker11 July 2010 at 12:48

    Well said, Baron.
    I can no longer stomach to trudge through the sewers of the warmist blogs you identify precisely because of their relentless Algore worship.

    Algore, Algore, Algore - frankly I too find it sickening beyond endurance.

    The man drives around on a cherry picker for God's sake. When the very mode of transport he prefers becomes a metaphor for his "science", how much more in your face can the AGW fraud be?

  3. It's a sad state of affairs that spoofing the warmist blogs is almost impossible because they're already parodies of themselves.

    "We're all doomed", "we're all going to die", "please save us Al Gore", "woe to the polar bears" - all just a snapshot sample of today's hysterical comments over at Real Climate.

    We'll know the earnest, doom monger's scam is over when Delingpole is Editor-in-chief at Nature, Booker is running New Scientist, Bolt has Sciencewatch and Oceanography Today has a swimsuit edition.

  4. My dearest Baron, there's no need to spoof the alarmists. My brilliant critique of the climategate "scientists" and their copious mendaciousness have completely proven beyond all doubt that the whole AGW is a hoax perpetrated to control the world, and fleece our collective wallets. No mere "scientist" can stand before the mighty focus of my godlike truthvision!! Those fools thought they could fool me, the Mighty Lonny Final Arbiter Of TRUTH!!!! Those smug sanctimonious "scientists" thought they were better than I Lonny the ultimate superscientist. Hang your heads in shame mere "scientists" I LONNY have seen through your veils of deception and passed my judgement upon you! Behold merest of mortals THE JUDGEMENT OF LONNY!!!!

    His Angelic Holiness Subjectiveist Of All Beings Unitary Inquiry Team Infallible Inquisitor Godemperor of Doom
    Lonny "The Loveliest" Eachus

  5. The ultraconservatives such as the Heartland Institute people, the members of Calgary's Chamber of Commerce and the Petroleum Club, the Canadian Society of Petroleum Geologists, the Ku Klux Klan, and the WildRose Alliance have always been more open minded than the AGW proponents - and thus much funnier. Really, their humour is so much more intelligent and creative...

  6. The current pope not only has a striking resemblance to Emperor Palpatine from the Star Wars documentaries, but it is also widely known among True Christians that the pope is actually the Antichrist. If we can make fun of the Pope, but not of Al-Gore, what does that make him? What could possibly worse than the Antichrist? I think logic dictates there is only one answer: Al-Gore is a muslin. The clue is in the name: Al-Gore, Al-Quaida, B. Hussain Al-Bama...

  7. Bishop Phil, a scientific illiterate afflicted with the malady of being a complete wanker19 July 2010 at 16:35

    Baron I've just had the most marvellous idea.

    As you know we have now seen three - count 'em, three - enquiries into the evil coven residing at the CRU.

    We've seen the Parliamentary Enquiry, the Oxburgh Enquiry and the Muir Russell Enquiry, all of which have studiously reported no evidence of wrongdoing when of course we all know that that's a lie.

    My proposal is that I, Bishop Phil, a renowned climate realist of some reputation (although not of course in the same league as your own) who once received a still-treasured email from Dr. McinTyres should, under the auspices of some of the most progressive brains in the country (Lord Lawson's Global Warming Policy Foundation springs readily to mind), conduct our own resolutely fair and independent enquiry where Jones and his odious crew will be found properly guilty.

    With your permission I shall attend to it right away, as there is no time to lose. We seem to have run out of manufactured scandals at present.

    The sooner all this loose talk about renewables and sustainability can be crushed the better.

  8. Bishop Phil, if you need some extra hands onboard for your "enquiry" you could get senator Inhofe and attorney general Cuccinelli to help you get to the "truth".

    Peter in Sweden

  9. You have my support, and some excellent suggestions from Mr. Anonymous, Bishop Phil.

    After all, as the witchfinders of previous generations were well aware of, the only way to root out evil is to know what you're looking for and where to find it.

    And you couldn't find a more fair minded or neutral bunch than the GWPF in the world.


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